Sunday, August 04, 2024

A man goes to the doctors complaining of migraines and headaches

After giving the man a regular check-up and running some tests, the doctor eventually returned with three bottles. One with blue pills, one with green pills, and one with red pills.

"This is a month's supply of pills." The doctor explains. "Every morning, take one of the blue pills with a large glass of water. Every lunchtime, take one of the green pills with another large glass of water. And at bedtime take one of the red pills with another large glass of water."

Concerned with the number of pills he's going to be taking, the man asks "What's wrong with me, doctor?"

"You're not drinking enough water."
A man goes to the doctors complaining of migraines and headaches
#joke #doctor

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Posted on 08/04/24 at 05:08 PM Joke of the Week (0) Comments ;

Sunday, July 28, 2024

Which is more painful

I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.

The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking.

My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing, and I said, "Nothing."

The reason I said "nothing" instead of saying "just thinking" is because she then would have asked, "About what?"

At that point I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics, which would lead to other questions.

Finally I pondered an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?

Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts, but how could they know?

Well, after another beer, and some more heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with an answer to that question.

Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn't really know, here is the reason for my conclusion:

A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."

But you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

I rest my case.

Time for another beer. Then maybe a nap.

Unknown Author

Source: Facebook

Posted on 07/28/24 at 08:00 AM Joke of the Week (0) Comments ;

Sunday, July 07, 2024

An Atheist’s Holiday

An atheist became incensed over Christmas holiday preparations. He filed a lawsuit about the constant celebrations given to Christians and Jews while atheists had no holiday to celebrate. The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the long, passionate presentation by the atheist's lawyer, the judge banged his gavel and declared, "Case dismissed!"The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling. "Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter, and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur, and Hanukkah. Yet, my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!"The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, "Obviously, your client is too confused to know about, much less celebrate, his own atheist holiday!" The lawyer pompously said, "Your honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be?" The judge replied, "Well, it comes every year on exactly the same date. Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, if your client says there is no God then, according to the Bible, he is a fool. April Fool's Day is his holiday. Now, get out of my courtroom!"-

#joke #lawyer #christmas #aprilfoolsday

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Posted on 07/07/24 at 08:00 AM Joke of the Week (0) Comments ;
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